All posts by Jimmy

Nick Saban Has Coronavirus

Nick Saban Contracted Coronavirus After Eating Bat Soup in China

Nick Saban has contracted SARS-CoV-2, the virus that causes coronavirus disease (COVID-19), better known as the Chinese virus.

Saban tested positive for the virus after eating bat soup at a market in Wuhan, China last month while recruiting an assistant ball boy.

Thousands of University of Alabama students and staff are now under quarantine. Alabama football spring practice has been canceled.

It is likely that Saban will be directly responsible for dozens if not hundreds of deaths across the state of Alabama over the coming weeks. Stay safe out there. And stay away from Nick Saban.

Did you like this article? You’ll love our petition.

Even Notre Lame Played Clemson Tougher Than Saban!

And I’m not even making that up… Notre Freaking Lame played Clemson tougher than Saban’s Alabama squad did in the national championship game.

Fire Nick Saban

Notre.

Lame.

Tonight, Saban was the cause of Alabama’s biggest blowout defeat in over a decade!

Let that sink in.

44-16.

Saban took a 16-14 lead and then was outscored 30-0 to end the game.

Thirty. To. Zero.

Time to fire this clown. Sign the petition now!

14 More Pictures of Nick Saban Looking Like a D-Bag

Seems that Parkway High School in Bossier City, Louisiana has a NO D-BAG rule, and Nick Saban is in clear violation of that rule. Good for them!

And now… back by popular demand (following up on our earlier article from 2013), here are 14 more pictures of Nick Saban looking like a d-bag…

Nick, how about a trigger warning next time you put on a penis hat?

‘muff said.

Nick is trying to figure out if this qualifies as a date or not.

Nick on Bourbon Street after getting escorted out of Rick’s Cabaret at 2 a.m.

Grandpa called. He wants his glasses back.

Grandma called. She wants her glasses back.

Gangsta, Nick. Total gangsta.

Corporate shill.

Nick actually thinks he’s the Fonz.
Ayyy!

Maybe put a little more gel in your hair next time, Nick.

D-bag meets Super D-bag.

Wink once if you think Nick is a d-bag.

Nick practicing his favorite “between-the-sheets” act.

This week at Cotillion by Nick: Proper sitting form for young women.

123 FBS Teams Have a Better Record Than Nick Saban in 2017

Thanks to Nick Saban, Alabama is winless at 0-1 in 2017.

The following FBS teams all have better records in 2017 than Nick Saban.

Clemson 1-0
Florida 1-0
Oklahoma 1-0
USC 1-0
Wisconsin 1-0
Air Force 0-0
Akron 0-0
Appalachian State 0-0
Arizona 0-0
Arizona State 0-0
Arkansas 0-0
Arkansas State 0-0
Army West Point 0-0
Ball State 0-0
Baylor 0-0
Boise State 0-0
Boston College 0-0
Bowling Green 0-0
Buffalo 0-0
BYU 0-0
California 0-0
Central Michigan 0-0
Charlotte 0-0
Cincinnati 0-0
Colorado 0-0
Colorado State 0-0
Connecticut 0-0
Duke 0-0
Eastern Michigan 0-0
East Carolina 0-0
FIU 0-0
Florida Atlantic 0-0
Florida State 0-0
Fresno State 0-0
Georgia 0-0
Georgia Southern 0-0
Georgia State 0-0
Georgia Tech 0-0
Hawaii 0-0
Houston 0-0
Idaho 0-0
Illinois 0-0
Indiana 0-0
Iowa State 0-0
Kansas 0-0
Kansas State 0-0
Kent State 0-0
Kentucky 0-0
LSU 0-0
Louisiana Tech 0-0
Louisiana-Lafayette 0-0
Louisiana-Monroe 0-0
Louisville 0-0
Marshall 0-0
Maryland 0-0
Massachusetts 0-0
Memphis 0-0
Miami (FL) 0-0
Miami (OH) 0-0
Michigan 0-0
Michigan State 0-0
Middle Tennessee 0-0
Minnesota 0-0
Ole Miss 0-0
Mississippi State 0-0
Missouri 0-0
Navy 0-0
Nebraska 0-0
Nevada 0-0
UNLV 0-0
New Mexico 0-0
New Mexico State 0-0
North Carolina 0-0
NC State 0-0
North Texas 0-0
NIU 0-0
Northwestern 0-0
Notre Dame 0-0
Ohio 0-0
Ohio State 0-0
Oklahoma State 0-0
Old Dominion 0-0
Oregon 0-0
Oregon State 0-0
Pittsburgh 0-0
Purdue 0-0
Rice 0-0
Rutgers 0-0
San Diego State 0-0
San Jose State 0-0
South Alabama 0-0
South Carolina 0-0
South Florida 0-0
SMU 0-0
Southern Miss 0-0
Stanford 0-0
Syracuse 0-0
TCU 0-0
Temple 0-0
Tennessee 0-0
Texas 0-0
Texas A&M 0-0
Texas State 0-0
Texas Tech 0-0
UCLA 0-0
UCF 0-0
UTEP 0-0
UTSA 0-0
Toledo 0-0
Troy 0-0
Tulane 0-0
Tulsa 0-0
Utah 0-0
Utah State 0-0
Vanderbilt 0-0
Virginia 0-0
Virginia Tech 0-0
Wake Forest 0-0
Washington 0-0
Washington State 0-0
West Virginia 0-0
Western Kentucky 0-0
Wyoming 0-0

Pathetic.

#FireSaban