Gumbo is Saban’s Crawdaddy

Look at this dufus! Also, the former president.

No one paying attention is shocked. Texas A&M probably lost to the Sisters of the Poor this weekend. (They lost to someone … they lose every weekend.) And yet, St. Nick made Jumbo Fish’s squad look like … well a football team. Even a good one. (They aren’t.) Coach AFLAC lost to the Volunteers, a program good in the 20th Century, who subsequently got stomped by Georgia. You remember Georgia, right? The guys who humiliated Alabama last year. Don’t worry — it’s not going to happen this year. Alabama would need to qualify for the SEC Championship game, and that’s now out the window.

Which brings me back to the original point: Saban just got embarrassed by Gumbo Kelly. The same buffoon who pretended to have a Southern accent. The same imbecile who grinds on his recruits like a drunken co-ed at the local club. The same savant who has been boat-raced in every big game he’s ever coached in. That Gumbo.

Gumbo came to the SEC claiming, “I want to beat Saban.” He then failed to beat Norvell. He got obliterated by Tennessee. His signature win at LSU this year was Ole Miss. Yes, Ole Piss. That joke of a program. Gumbo had beaten only one top-5 program in 12 years at Notre LAME: Clemson. And that was when their quarterback and half their defense was sidelined. He’s a joke.

So, Gumbo said he was coming to the SEC to beat Saban. You might think that was an aspiration that would take years, right? Given his track record of ineptitude? Nope. Year One. Why? Saban is a hack.

For the two-point conversion, Gumbo ran the EXACT SAME PLAY he ran in 2014 at Notre LAME against Florida State in a similar situation. (Look it up.) Does Saban watch less game film than we do at Obviously! Too much time cavorting with talking ducks on the AFLAC set.

When can we fire this moron?

8 thoughts on “Gumbo is Saban’s Crawdaddy

  1. My dick is 2.4 inches soft and 2.5 girth hard it’s 3.1 inches. And 3.1 girth I have never seen another man with a dick as skinny as mine and the head of my dick soft is smaller than the tip of my fiancé pinky finger and doesn’t get that much bigger when I’m hard i also have 2.5 inches of for-skin over my head when fully hard

  2. Here are some of the comments and things I have had to accept from women over my lifetime – “Where’s the beef, and “I wish you were 2 inches longer”, I thought only white men had small penises” Some women would just laugh looking at my tiny flaccid dick”, many women only fucking me one time, “being told there the last man had a big dick”, “never being told I have a big dick”, “laughing at me when they see my dick the first time”, “when are you going to put it inside, already being in her pussy”, “do feel me, otherwise telling me she doesn’t feel my dick inside her pussy”. I always had the shortest dick in showering with men and if there was another man occasionally it would be as short as me.

    I have never seen a black man and many white men with a dick when flaccid or erect as short as mine. After all of this, I had to finally accept my dick is truly short and has been known by many women now and in the past for my entire life. If I didn’t have any money or good looks I may have never been able to fuck the women I have met in my lifetime.

  3. Flaccid Length: -1 – 0.5 inches
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    You don’t end up becoming President of the Itty Bitty Dick Committee by accident, that position must be earned, and God Damn I earn the fkn hell out of it!

  4. My micropenis and miniballs are very tiny and small soft and erect , fully erect I am less than two inches long by fingersize width and diameter when fully erect and I have severe premature ejaculation and cum in less than 5 to 10 seconds but I only cum a very tiny miniscule amount of cum. all women I have ever dated dumped me immediately upon seeing my tiny micropenis and miniballs!!! all my ex girlfriends have forced me to be an adult sissy gurl in sissy baby gurl panties and dresses and outfits and makeup Shirley temple wigs and Mary Jane shoes and buttplugs 24/7; only have gay boyfriends since I cannot satisfy a woman like a real man can !!!

  5. my tiny sissy dick is so small when soft you can’t measure it and it’s about 1.5 inches fully erect. You can see pictures if you google ” my sissy clitty of a dick 3″ I hope you enjoy and please share it with everyone you can.

  6. Confession: I barely even have a micro penis
    If I’m soft it doesn’t stick out at all. Even erect I don’t measure 2 inches.

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  8. I was with my girlfriend since she was 20 and I was 22. We met on tinder and I fucked her within 30 mins of meeting her. I spend 45 days just fucking her but she was hot, sweet, had glasses and we had hot sex.

    I’m 5’7 she’s 5’10 but I think I’m pretty good sized dick for my size. About 6.2 inches long.. 5.1 girth. About 2 years into our relationship I was kinda bitter about her sexual experience vs mine and wanted to swing. I was young and wanted to be a player and fuck some other guys wife’s and girlfriends and fuck some 50 year old women with limp dick husbands. I kept bugging my girl about swinging and she was reluctant. Worried if I wouldn’t be able to handle it and wouldn’t be happy about the memory of it in the future and it might damage our relationship. I was consistent though and I kept at it. Id look up websites and events and read the event webpage to her and she’d seem like she wasn’t crazy about the idea but didn’t want to be unwilling, thinking that would be acting like a “bad girlfriend” which I disagree with but didn’t express it at the time because that would’ve been counter productive. One evening I was exploring local swinging groups on KIK and found a couple who were our age.. a little older. The guy was 28 his girl was 26. He liked a video of my girl giving me a blow job that I shared in the group. He wanted to swing and sent me pics of his girlfriend. She was hot and smaller than my girl so I wanted to fuck her. He asked my dick size and shared his. He was a little bigger than me. By about an inch in length and .4 inches in girth.. 7.25 Length 5.50 Girth. I thought it would be stupid to bring a guy with a bigger dick than me when all I want is an excuse to fuck another guys girlfriend. I said no.

    A month later I get a message from him and I see “😈😈😈😈😈😝😝😝 I FUCKED”
    In my message box before I open it. What I see sends a weird surge of electricity through my nervous system and a massive wave of absolute horror has my heart exploding out of my chest. It said 😈😈😈😈😈😝😝😝😝😝 I FUCKED YOUR GIRL!!!!! “ I could feel my neck pulsing and just as I know a huge meltdown of a lifetime is happening… I find myself raging horny. I opened it and a gif is there already playing and it’s him standing in front of my girlfriend who has her right knee is almost behind her shoulder but closer to her armpit than her shoulder.. and the guy is holding her left ankle and staring at her with no expression on his face while she is blowing air through her cheeks as his big dick is slipping and sliding in and out of her cunt as she looks at him with this almost angry look, growling at him and she’s almost doing a half sit up to look at him as she shakes her head with this deep frowning, snarling look on her face with her fupa flexed like a rock and her stomach thumping like a peddal drum.

    He just keeps pumping my girlfriends cunt and I am fapping to it and saying out loud “I AM FAPPING MY SKINNY SHORT DICK! YOURE RUINING HER CUNT FOR MY SMALL DICK! YOURE BLOWING THE BACK OF MY GIRLS CUNT OUT WITH YOUR BIG DICK! YOU TURNED HER INTO YOUR SLUT AND RUINED HER CUNT FOR ME AND MY LITTLE STUPID PENCIL THIN COCK AND I AM RUINED. I was trying so hard to fantasize about humiliating myself and I messaged him and told him he had a big dick and he destroyed me and ruined my girlfriend for my tiny dick. I couldn’t believe what I was doing but I wanted to do it. I didn’t say anything about it for years because I was in the closet about it but now I love to fap to it all the time and share the videos with everyone and let them know what happened to me. I love it when women masturbate to him and want his cock. It makes me feel cuckold over and over from the same experience but cuckolded by a different woman. It turns me on that what turned me into a cuckold with gay thoughts when I was just the opposite.. makes a woman wet and want to rub her pussy to it and it’s so hot how bad some women I’ve shared with… want the guy who is fucking my girlfriend. They say things to me about what they fantasize about that they probably wouldn’t want to tell him because they don’t want to stroke his ego too much.

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